Diary

Gulzar

Diary

Gulzar

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    na jaane kis ye Diary hai

    na naam hai, na pata hai koii:

    ''har ek karvaT maiñ yaad kartā huuñ tum ko lekin

    ye karvaTeñ lete raat din yuuñ masal rahe haiñ mire badan ko

    tumhārī yādoñ ke jism par niil paḌ ga.e haiñ''

    ek aur safhe pe yuuñ likhā hai:

    ''kabhī kabhī raat siyāhī,

    kuchh aisī chehre pe jam jaatī hai

    laakh ragḌūñ,

    sahar ke paanī se laakh dho.ūñ

    magar vo kālak nahīñ utartī

    milogī jab tum pata chalegā

    maiñ aur bhī kaalā ho gayā huuñ

    ye hāshiye meñ likhā huā hai:

    ''maiñ dhuup meñ jal ke itnā kaalā nahīñ huā thā

    ki jitnā is raat maiñ sulag ke siyah huā hūñ''

    mahīn lafzoñ meñ ik jagah yuuñ likhā hai is ne:

    ''tumheñ bhī to yaad hogī vo raat sardiyoñ

    jab auñdhī kashtī ke nīche ham ne

    badan ke chūlhe jalā ke taape the, din kiyā thā

    ye pattharoñ bichhaunā hargiz na saḳht lagtā jo tum bhī hotīñ

    tumheñ bichhātā bhī oḌhtā bhī''

    ik aur safhe pe phir usī raat bayāñ hai:

    ''tum ek takiye meñ giile bāloñ bhar ke ḳhushbū,

    jo aaj bhejo

    to niiñd aa jaa.e, so jā.ūñ''

    kuchh aisā lagtā hai jis ne bhī Diary likhī hai

    vo shahr aayā hai gaañv meñ chhoḌ kar kisī ko

    talāsh meñ kaam ke shāyad:

    ''maiñ shahr is machine meñ fiT huuñ jaise Dhibrī,

    zarūrī hai ye zarā purza

    aham bhī hai kyuuñ ki roz ke roz tel de kar

    ise zarā aur kas ke jaatā hai chief merā

    vo roz kastā hai,

    roz ik pech aur chaḌhtā hai jab nasoñ par,

    to meñ aatā hai zahr khā luuñ

    bhaag jā.ūñ''

    kuchh ukhḌe ukhḌe, kaTe hue se ajiib jumle,

    ''kahānī vo jis meñ ek shahzādī chaaT letī hai

    apnī añgushtarī hīrā,

    vo tum ne puurī nahīñ sunā.ī''

    ''kaḌoñ meñ sonā nahīñ hai,

    un par sunahrī paanī chaḌhā huā hai''

    ik aur zevar zikr bhī hai:

    ''vo naak nath na bechnā tum

    vo jhūTā motī hai, tum se sachchā kahā thā maiñ ne,

    sunār ke paas ke sharmindagī hogī''

    ye vaqt thaan khultā rahtā hai pal ba pal,

    aur log poshākeñ kaaT kar,

    apne apne andāz se pahante haiñ vaqt lekin

    jo maiñ ne kaaTī thī thaan se ik qamīz

    vo tañg ho rahī hai!''

    kabhī kabhī is pighalte lohe garm bhaTTī meñ kaam karte,

    ThiThurne lagtā hai ye badan jaise saḳht sardī meñ bhun rahā ho,

    buḳhār rahtā hai kuchh dinoñ se

    magar ye satreñ baḌī ajab haiñ

    kahīñ tavāzun bigaḌ gayā hai

    koī sīvan udhaḌ ga.ī hai:

    ''farār huuñ maiñ ka.ī dinoñ se

    jo ghup-añdhere tiir jaisī surañg ik kaan se

    shurūa ho ke dūsre kaan tak ga.ī hai,

    maiñ us nalī meñ chhupā huā huuñ,

    tum aa ke tinke se mujh ko bāhar nikāl lenā

    ''koī nahīñ aa.egā ye kiiḌe nikālne ab

    ki un ko to shahr meñ dhuāñ de ke maarā jaatā hai nāliyoñ meñ''

    na jaane kis ki ye Diary hai

    na nam hai, na pata hai koi:

    har ek karwaT main yaad karta hun tum ko lekin

    ye karwaTen lete raat din yun masal rahe hain mere badan ko

    tumhaari yaadon ke jism par nil paD gae hain

    ek aur safhe pe yun likha hai:

    kabhi kabhi raat ki siyahi,

    kuchh aisi chehre pe jam si jati hai

    lakh ragDun,

    sahar ke pani se lakh dhoun

    magar wo kalak nahin utarti

    milogi jab tum pata chalega

    main aur bhi kala ho gaya hun

    ye hashiye mein likha hua hai:

    main dhup mein jal ke itna kala nahin hua tha

    ki jitna is raat main sulag ke siyah hua hun

    mahin lafzon mein ek jagah yun likha hai is ne:

    tumhen bhi to yaad hogi wo raat sardiyon ki

    jab aundhi kashti ke niche hum ne

    badan ke chulhe jala ke tape the, din kiya tha

    ye pattharon ka bichhauna hargiz na saKHt lagta jo tum bhi hotin

    tumhein bichhata bhi oDhta bhi

    ek aur safhe pe phir usi raat ka bayan hai:

    tum ek takiye mein gile baalon ki bhar ke KHushbu,

    jo aaj bhejo

    to nind aa jae, so hi jaun

    kuchh aisa lagta hai jis ne bhi Diary likhi hai

    wo shahr aaya hai ganw mein chhoD kar kisi ko

    talash mein kaam hi ke shayad:

    main shahr ki is machine mein fiT hun jaise Dhibri,

    zaruri hai ye zara sa purza

    aham bhi hai kyun ki roz ke roz tel de kar

    ise zara aur kas ke jata hai chief mera

    wo roz kasta hai,

    roz ek pech aur chaDhta hai jab nason par,

    to ji mein aata hai zahr kha lun

    ya bhag jaun

    kuchh ukhDe ukhDe, kaTe hue se ajib jumle,

    kahani wo jis mein ek shahzadi chaT leti hai

    apni angushtari ka hira,

    wo tum ne puri nahin sunai

    kaDon mein sona nahin hai,

    un par sunahri pani chaDha hua hai

    ek aur zewar ka zikr bhi hai:

    wo nak ki nath na bechna tum

    wo jhuTa moti hai, tum se sachcha kaha tha main ne,

    sunar ke pas ja ke sharmindagi si hogi

    ye waqt ka than khulta rahta hai pal ba pal,

    aur log poshaken kaT kar,

    apne apne andaz se pahante hain waqt lekin

    jo main ne kaTi thi than se ek qamiz

    wo tang ho rahi hai!

    kabhi kabhi is pighalte lohe ki garm bhaTTi mein kaam karte,

    ThiThurne lagta hai ye badan jaise saKHt sardi mein bhun raha ho,

    buKHar rahta hai kuchh dinon se

    magar ye satren baDi ajab hain

    kahin tawazun bigaD gaya hai

    ya koi siwan udhaD gai hai:

    farar hun main kai dinon se

    jo ghup-andhere ki tir jaisi surang ek kan se

    shurua ho ke dusre kan tak gai hai,

    main us nali mein chhupa hua hun,

    tum aa ke tinke se mujh ko bahar nikal lena

    koi nahin aaega ye kiDe nikalne ab

    ki un ko to shahr mein dhuan de ke mara jata hai naliyon mein

    Source :
    • Book : Chand Pukhraj Ka (Pg. 49)
    • Author : Gulzar
    • Publication : Roopa And Company (1995)
    • Edition : 1995
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